Current:Home > Markets'Vanderpump Rules' star Raquel Leviss says she has a 'love addiction.' Is it a real thing? -ApexWealth
'Vanderpump Rules' star Raquel Leviss says she has a 'love addiction.' Is it a real thing?
TradeEdge Exchange View
Date:2025-04-06 17:08:23
Is it possible to become addicted to love? "Vanderpump Rules" star Raquel Leviss − and mental health experts − say it is.
Leviss, who now goes by Rachel and gained notoriety this year for having an affair with her co-star and former friend Ariana Madix's then-boyfriend Tom Sandoval, revealed on the "Just B with Bethenny Frankel" podcast Wednesday she recently learned she suffers from love addiction.
Though love addiction doesn't appear in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, which psychologists use to diagnose mental health conditions, experts agree it's a legitimate phenomenon and one that can lead to disastrous consequences.
"You can blow up your life or other people's," says Stacy Thiry, a mental health clinician with Grow Therapy, adding that these people can be driven to affairs, cyber-stalking and other destructive behavior. "It can be dangerous. Oftentimes it can lead to abusive cycles in relationships as well, so it really is something to be aware of."
What causes love addiction?
At its core, love addiction is a form of anxiety characterized by fears of unworthiness and abandonment.
Stephanie Sarkis, a psychotherapist and author of the book "Healing from Toxic Relationships," says people with anxious attachment styles or those who experienced neglect, abuse or abandonment in childhood are more likely to become addicted.
As a result of experiencing absent or fleeting love early in life, these people, she says, crave approval, affection and intimacy as adults, similar to how some may crave drugs or alcohol.
"You feel like you don't have value outside of a relationship, and you put a lot of meaning onto your relationship to the point where you feel like you can't function without it," Sarkis says.
Love addiction can get exacerbated if someone is in a relationship in which affection arrives intermittently and unpredictably, she adds. This causes the person to wonder when their next "hit" of love is coming and, by extension, their brains to crave it even more.
"It becomes like an addiction where you get a hit basically from this person contacting you, and then, if they don't contact you, you can go through anxiety and rumination, obsession about the relationship," she says. "If a person is inconsistent with their attention, our brains tend to get hooked on that, because it's like a drug hit and withdrawal."
Adam Jablin, a certified life coach and author of the book "Lotsaholic: From a Sick to Sober Superman," says he's worked with many clients who had a love addiction that compounded other habits.
Jablin notes a more accurate name for love addiction might be approval addiction, since the rush sought is quite different from the feelings of security found in a healthy relationship.
"A lot of people with love addiction, they're craving approval," he says. "What they're not realizing is that love and approval are two totally separate things."
'Vanderpump Rules' drama:Tom Sandoval, Raquel Leviss, Ariana Madix and forgiveness
Mega Millions reached over $1.5B.When does playing the lottery become a problem?
Struggling with love addiction? Try these tips
If you think you might have a love addiction, therapists offer the following tips:
- Seek therapy: Mental health experts agree love addiction is best treated with the help of a professional.
- Join a support group: Thiry recommends joining groups like Love Addicts Anonymous online, and Sarkis adds 12-step programs like Co-Dependents Anonymous and Adult Children of Alcoholics & Dysfunctional Families can also help people cope with love addiction. "Having a group environment can be really helpful, because that can be an opportunity to have healthy relationships with healthy boundaries modeled for you to experience what healthy does look and feel like," Thiry says.
- Figure out your attachment style: Finding out if you have an anxious attachment style through counseling or research can also help shed light on what you're feeling.
- Feel your feelings: "Part of the healing process is getting in touch with feeling your feelings and confronting them and experiencing them," Sarkis says. "It can be daunting for someone that has survived by shoving their feelings down. It can take some work, and progress comes in stages. You want to be really gentle with yourself."
'Vanderpump Rules' reunion highlights:Tom Sandoval, Ariana Madix get into heated fight
Many people cheat in the summer.How to prevent it and improve your relationship.
veryGood! (68)
Related
- 'Kraven the Hunter' spoilers! Let's dig into that twisty ending, supervillain reveal
- Inside Clean Energy: Solid-State Batteries for EVs Make a Leap Toward Mass Production
- Journalists at Gannett newspapers walk out over deep cuts and low pay
- ‘We’re Losing Our People’
- Can Bill Belichick turn North Carolina into a winner? At 72, he's chasing one last high
- Reddit CEO Steve Huffman: 'It's time we grow up and behave like an adult company'
- Kim Kardashian Is Freaking Out After Spotting Mystery Shadow in Her Selfie
- A New Plant in Indiana Uses a Process Called ‘Pyrolysis’ to Recycle Plastic Waste. Critics Say It’s Really Just Incineration
- Nearly half of US teens are online ‘constantly,’ Pew report finds
- Our first podcast episode made by AI
Ranking
- Google unveils a quantum chip. Could it help unlock the universe's deepest secrets?
- Dive Into These Photos From Jon Hamm’s Honeymoon With Wife Anna Osceola
- Epstein survivors secure a $290 million settlement with JPMorgan Chase
- Inside Clean Energy: The US’s New Record in Renewables, Explained in Three Charts
- 'Squid Game' without subtitles? Duolingo, Netflix encourage fans to learn Korean
- Chad Michael Murray's Wife Sarah Roemer Is Pregnant With Baby No. 3
- Saudi Arabia cuts oil production again to shore up prices — this time on its own
- One Direction's Liam Payne Completes 100-Day Rehab Stay After Life-Changing Moment
Recommendation
Pregnant Kylie Kelce Shares Hilarious Question Her Daughter Asked Jason Kelce Amid Rising Fame
Toxic Releases From Industrial Facilities Compound Maryland’s Water Woes, a New Report Found
Texas Study Finds ‘Massive Amount’ of Toxic Wastewater With Few Options for Reuse
Save 45% On the Cult Favorite Philosophy 3-In-1 Shampoo, Shower Gel, and Bubble Bath
SFO's new sensory room helps neurodivergent travelers fight flying jitters
Need a job? Hiring to flourish in these fields as humans fight climate change.
In Pivotal Climate Case, UN Panel Says Australia Violated Islanders’ Human Rights
Sky-high egg prices are finally coming back down to earth